this is a website where I will post useless garbage that has little to no bearing on reality. also, I'm not gonna use too many capitol letters. maybe I'll have other fun/groovy stuff.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

here I am

Here I am, with nothing to do... So like moths to a flame, or flames to the gay pride march, or march to april, not the month but the one with the fingernails that sound like a cat's would sound if they made noise, I return to this blog even though everyone has long since stopped reading it.
It is useless, but its a welcome change from giving my friends sex-changes with cheap software, or listening to my vocorded self say 'nothing can come between us' through an infinite number of different filters. Highpass, lowpass, bandpass, and my alltime favorurite timewaster: the notch filter. It cuts out, everything but one tiny range of frequencies, or cuts one tiny range of frequencies out of anything.
And I think to myself: "I wonder what a fourrier transform of a bandpass filter would looklike" but it wouldn't look very interesting, thats why we have fourrier transformations, to simplify things.
Mathematically its easy to simplify things, and its easy to reach a point where you can prove nothing else can be simplified. In reality (my second favourite kind of math), its even easier because of the awesome power of denial. We can glance over as many details as we chose and observe something as simple as we desire. Even something as profoundly unpationate as that isn't safe from the rigours of barbaric statistical analysis.
I wonder what a fourrier transform of my life would like. Hopefully it could be plotted as a straight line on Gaussian deveate axes, and be uniquely defined by only two parameters. Mother and father? Maybe I'll write about statistical decision theory and receiver operating characteristic curves some other time. Writing's not as fun as it could be, but it's more fun than it couldn't be. Especially that one time.
I leave with this note:
(tward et al, 2005)

or so it seems

Saturday, April 09, 2005

guitar

I got a guitar

it is fake mohogany colour

also it has 6 strings

Sunday, February 27, 2005

ow

my back hurts

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

shut up

so many fuckers complain about how the world isn't perfect. shut up!! nothing is perfect and nothing ever will be. complain about something useful, or at least something that is possible. like hungry children or mustard that squirts out of the bottle too fast. perfection doesn't exist, if it did, it would make me wrong, which therefore, would be imperfect , because in a perfect world no one would ever be wrong. HA I win

Thursday, February 17, 2005

I'm back and off the crack

I came home to find a poster on the wall. There was a hot woman in bed with two guys and on top it said, "I'm back and off the crack."

Underneath there are pictures of her penis.

Why is it on the wall? I don't understand.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Reality Makeover TV

i invented a new reality TV show. it's called "surprise sex change". They find random people and tell them they've won a free makeover, then they blindfold them, then they tell them the smell is just hair bleach, but actually it is chloroform. when they're unconscious, they get a sex change and get made over as the opposite sex. instant hit.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

it's been a while

it's been a while...or has it?
duhn duhn duuuuuuuummm

Wednesday, January 05, 2005


this is a picture of my baby finger on new years, what you can't see is that on the other side of the finger is lurking an uspeakable evil, so powerful you could not possibly comprehend its very existence